Do you hate goose ? Of of course you do . venerate not , because the GOOSINATOR is here to save the day .

twat are probably pretty much the bad thing on Earth . People talk about the Black Death like it was some sort of great scourge of human beings , but scriptural - grade pestilence ca n’t concord a candle to geese , in the grand scheme of thing . Geese are noisy , immense , and ornery in a way of life that get you wonder what selective force per unit area could possibly have shape the phylogenesis of a bird whose most finely honed skills are , in burden :

1 . Chasing after you ( yes you , nonchalant jogger / trail - Alice Walker / riverbank breeze - enjoyer ) , hissing wildly as it waddles toward you more quick and aggressively than a word like “ waddle ” would lead you to think is possible .

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2 . Pooping EVERYWHERE . ( A individual goosedrops over one pound of poop per day . )

Geese , their violent tendencies , and their fecund bowels can get so bad that sometimes authorities are forced to play in other animals to scare them off . Often these hatchet man - animals are swan , because if there ’s one thing you may rely on to get rid of big , noisy , belligerent birds , it ’s bigger , noisier , more belligerent birds . Sometimes the swan thing works ( kind of ) . Other times , the great unwashed curve up utter . So , you eff , kind of a toss - up .

https://gizmodo.com/man-drowns-after-being-attacked-by-swan-5902636

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All this is to say that geese are a menace to society , that sometimes they need dealing with , and that replacing one big waterfowl with another , big waterfowl is not always an selection . Sometimes , you just wish someone would invent a gigantic , orange , remote - controlled robot with shark - tooth nose art remindful ofWWII military aircraftand name it , like , GOOSE - BLASTER or something .

Oh wait , someone totally did .

Enter GOOSINATOR — a mammoth , orange , remote - controlled automaton with shark - tooth nose art specifically design to assault geese . That ’s it pictured up top . They ’re being deployed all over the United States , most recently in Denver . Over at Discovery News , Alyssa Danigelis tells of the urban center ’s jerky quandary :

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Usually , parks in the [ Denver ] surface area have turn to dogs to discourage the geese , but they can cost $ 500 a day to employ and they ’re limited as to how fast they can move and where they can go . The Goosinator is a remote - controlled , barrage - powered golem made from orange foam painted to resemble a devilish , grinning beast . It can move up to 25 knot per hour .

As the video here demonstrates , the GOOSINATOR is every minute as good on grass , ice , and snow as it is on H2O — all places geese are wo nt to lounge and ooze . At three grand a pop , Denver park official conceive the GOOSINATOR will be a cost effective solution to their dilemma ( just clean up after the geese costs ~$1,000 dollar a week ) .

“ We humanely are returning wildlife back to the wild , at your fingertips , ” Claussen tell The Denver Post . According to Danigelis , GOOSINATORS have already been deployed in Massachusetts , Wisconsin , and New York , and are proving an effective alternative to “ rounding up geese and shoot down them , which is what happened last summer , according to NY’sJournal News . ”

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[ The Denver PostviaDiscovery News ]

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