What in effect way to celebrate the end of the yr ’s biggest shopping weekend than with 10 things you mercifully did not buy ? The following gadgets and thingamabob , have in the Holiday 2007 SkyMall catalog , shew without a doubt that the human race is going straight to Inferno :
10.Chilled Shot Machine – $ 150When it total Jäger , I look at myself something of an aficionado , a snoot really . I do n’t mind spending a little money to control that when I model down to do shot , each and every one will be chilled to the ideal temperature . That way I know whether I ’m on my first or my 12th , the experience will be plenteous and memorable .
9.Hot Dog Grill and Bun Warmer – $ 50I empathize some speciality kitchen appliances , like ice - cream Maker , deep fryers and thin - slice mandolines . But do we really need a $ 50 product that at the same time mimics the microwave and the wassailer to prepare a meal that has utterly zero gastronomical value ? I mean , I want one , but do we really call for this ?
8.E - Z Chord Kit – $ 42As a guitar player I ’m scandalize by this one : or else of sitting down and discover G , C and D , you seize a $ 42 setup to your guitar that plays the chords for you . Even if it is laughably easy , how many bird do you think you ’ll score with a handicapable guitar that tells the macrocosm you ’re not fresh enough to do what Toby Keith somehow figured out ?
7.Basho the Sumo Wrestler Table – $ 225Basho is n’t a widget per se , but a deep brown table in the flesh of a large , mostly naked Japanese man ranch - eagled on the level kinda screamed Gizmodo to me . You will be happy to hear that he was crafted of “ quality graphic designer rosin for display in home or garden . ” That ’ll scare away away the chipmunks .
6.Freddie Mercury Action Figure – $ 45I could n’t decide whether to express mirth or cry when I watch this . piteous bushed Fred , here with bollock - joint cervix and articulated shoulder for your twist joy . A motion sensor ( blot out God knows where ) spark a medley of Hellenic Queen songs . And I hate to have to differentiate you , but there ’s also a Kurt Cobain digit . COURTNEY , YOU WHORE ! ! !
5.Trailer Hitch Stand and Chairs – $ 200This has to be the funniest picture SkyMall has ever printed . There ’s no way to fake the glee on those tailgaters ’ face . listen you , this is not for all sportsfans : each ass has a weighting limitation of 250 pounds , and seats only fare in green or blue . I experience like bolshy should be mandatory , at least when embark to Boston or St. Louis .
4.Animated Hitch Critters – $ 25The only reason not to purchase those hitch - stand hot seat is that they would keep you from establish a motorized , light - up Hitch Critter . Is n’t it cute how the deer waves “ Do n’t shoot ! Do n’t sprout ! ” as he sport an dry target on his chest of drawers ? Do n’t miss the dying Pisces or the “ Duck ! ” duck , also with cheery carmine aim . humans , I just hump when my funniness and my killing go bridge player in hand .
3.5.0 Digital Binocular Camera – $ 250There ’s nothing terribly wrong with these light-headed digital - camera binoculars . In fact , I kinda care the approximation of them . No , what I cogitate was frightening about this product was SkyMall ’s # 1 sales bullet point : “ ban IN SOME SPORTS ARENAS ! ” Super cherubic ! It ’ll make you the envy of all your friends , until it ’s wrested away from you at the entry gate .
2.Pre - Decorated Christmas Tree – $ 200So it ’s come to this , has it ? Our lazy society wants to enjoy in the Christmas spirit , as long as it does n’t involve such formerly festive natural action as tree trimming ? I never really thought of “ bewilder into the purport ” as a scuffle . I stand corrected . And one more matter : if it ’s going to come pre - grace , should n’t it at least be pre - embellish by someone with taste ?
1.Alive Elvis Animatronic Robot – $ 300Devoted Gizmodo lector know that we bothworshipandfearthe animatronic Elvis , though it is without a doubt evidence of a society gone sorry . We only have one final , haunting question : why does the automaton King look so much like Rob Schneider ?
Of course , the best room to reckon this one - way ticket to eternal damnation is all at once , in a big chilling SkyMall shopping cart :
https://gizmodo.com/wowees-elvis-bot-viva-las-vegas-226627
[ SkyMall ]
NOTE : In the event that the data formatting appears sleep with up in your browser app , try change your font size of it ( CTRL or COMMAND + or – commonly does the trick ) . I try on my best to make this thing work at multiple sizing but I ’m no HTML wizard and honestly , I ’ve spent enough metre on this sister already .
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